300+ Best Dirty Pick-Up Lines: Get Your Game On for 2024

1. Excuse me, but does my tongue taste funny to you?

2. I'm just like a pore strip. Hard to get off, but extremely satisfied once you do.

3. Wanna share your side of the bed tonight?

4. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

5. I don't think I want your babies, but I wouldn't mind refining my baby-making technique with you.

6. I just checked the weather report, and there's a 95% chance you're getting six inches tonight.

Are these cute or cringe? It all depends on who’s sending them and what kind of profile they’ve got. Your match will go straight to your profile to see who’s saying these things — get help from ROAST so they like what they see. ROAST is an app and service that uses real science to optimize your profile and increase its chances of success.

7. What is a nice person like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?

8. One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong?

9. You look so good; I wanna kiss your lips and move up to your belly button.

10. Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under.

11. Let only latex stand between our love.

12. According to my enchanted wristwatch, you're not wearing any panties. Yeah, you! Oh my, I guess it's running an hour fast.

13. Let's play carpenter. First, we'll get hammered; then, I'll nail you.

14. Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie. I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.

15. Let's help mother earth and save water by showering together.

16. We should play strip poker. You can strip, and I'll poke you.

17. Do you have a cell phone in your back pocket? Because your ass is calling to me.

18. What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper.

19. I wanna floss with your pubic hair.

This could come off a million different ways depending on how your profile looks. Maximize your chances of success with the expert advice from ROAST. ROAST has real human advice combined with AI learning to judge your profile and offer suggestions for improvement. Try it today.

20. I would only kick you out of bed to f*ck you on the floor.

1. I’ll be Burger King, and you be McDonald’s. I’ll have it my way, and you’ll be lovin’ it.

2. There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it.

3. Hey girl, is your name winter? Because you'll be coming soon.

4. Are you a stack of dirty dishes? Because I want to get you wet and do you all night long.

5. Are you a sea lion? Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight.

The first question is, do they like puns or don’t they? The second question is, will they start liking puns after they see your profile? They are far more likely to if you recruit help from ROAST. ROAST is an app and service that utilizes years of scientific research into the most successful dating profiles — and uses it on you. Try ROAST today.

6. Are you a drill sergeant? Because you have my privates standing at attention.

7. My doctor told me I have a vitamin D deficiency. Want to go back to my place and fix that for me?

8. I'm a bird watcher, and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher. Have you seen one?

9. I’m a freelance gynecologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?

10. I love your outfit. I would love it even more crumpled in a heap on my bedroom floor.

11. Make out with me if I am wrong, but isn't the Earth flat?

12. My lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow?

13. I think you're suffering from a lack of vitamin me.

14. I'd love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. And the ones on your face.

15. hand over your car keys so I can drive you wild.

16. Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you.

17. Did you just come out of the oven? Because you’re hot.

18. They say kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me?

19. I’m like a Rubik’s Cube; the more you play with me, the harder I get.

20. Let me suggest an excellent strategy to work off the calories in that beverage.

1. You're so hot even my zipper is falling for you.

2. Wanna help me get on Santa's naughty list this year?

3. I'm not a weather predictor, but you can foresee some additional inches at night.

4. Want to see if you can add “has an awesome gag reflex” to your resume?

5. Do you go to church often? Because you're gonna, be on your knees tonight.

6. My nightlight burned out, and I'm terrified of the darkness. Will you be my companion for tonight?

7. I'm having trouble sleeping by myself. Can you sleep with me?

8. You must be Medusa because you make me rock hard.

9. Let me guess your favorite position: anything that involves my balls bouncing against your ass.

10. Are those jeans Guess? Because guess who wants to be inside them?

11. I think I could fall madly in bed with you.

12. Are you a supermarket sample? Because I want to taste you again and again without any sense of shame.

13. Is it hot in here, or is it just you?

14. The size, warmth, and beauty of your grin are practically on par with mine.

15. If we are what we consume, then by tomorrow morning, I may be you.

As soon as someone sees this pop up in their phone, the first thing they’re going to do is check the profile. Will they see a picture of someone giving a weird, scary grin in a dark room — or a bright, friendly smile with perfect natural lighting? ROAST will judge that for you and tell you exactly what you should do differently. Their advice is completely personalized. Boost your chances of success with ROAST.

16. Don’t ever change. Just get naked.

17. My place or yours? What do you know? The coin toss is on me. Head at my place, tail at yours.

18. Are you a flappy bird? Because I could tap you all night.

19. Let’s go to my place and do some math. Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.

20. You’re like my pinky toe; I’m gonna bang you on every piece of furniture in my home.

1. I'm scared of getting pregnant, so do you want to go up to my room and help me test all my condoms?

2. Do you have pet insurance? Because your pussy's getting smashed tonight.

3. What time do your legs open? I don't want to be late.

4. The body is yours for the rest of your life; I just want it for tonight.

When they see your profile, will they give it to you? There are researchers out there who will make sure that they do. ROAST has a team of people whose entire job is to get you laid, and they’ll offer better help in that department than anybody else. They’ll show you what you’re doing wrong on your profile and then fix it for you. Start by taking their short quiz today.

5. Let's play house. You can be the door; then I can slam you all I want.

6. That's a beautiful smile, but it'd look even better if it were all you were wearing.

7. What has four legs but no lovely girl on it? My bed. Care to make a change?

8. Are you a pirate? Because I have a lot of semen waiting for you.

9. If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

10. I'll show you my tan lines if you'll show me yours.

11. Let's play Titanic. You'll be the iceberg, and I'll go down.

12. Are you a shark? Because I’ve got some swimmers for you to swallow.

13. Let me insert my plug into your socket, and we can generate some electricity.

14. Fuck me if I’m incorrect, but dinosaurs are alive, right?

15. I think my allergies are acting up. Because every time you are around, my dick swells up.

16. I’ve just received government funding for a four-hour expedition to find your G-spot.

17. I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bedrock.

18. Your face is like a wrench; every time I look at it, my balls tighten up.

19. Why pay for a bra when I would gladly hold your boobs up all day for free?

20. Your body is made up of 70% water. . .and I’m thirsty.

1. With school, I just want an A. With you, I just want to F.

2. Did you have Lucky Charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious.

3. In every way, I'm in charge. Do you want to experience how I boss around?

4. Generally, do you identify as a "green" person? Please assist me in using the condom in my pocket before it expires.

5. Are you an exam? Because you have been the focus of my intense attention.

6. Please let me know when you’ll return to my place.

Are they going to get the joke? It all depends on who’s saying it. ROAST is a service run by experts who’ll know exactly how your profile reads to the other person. No more wondering if it’s setting the right tone; ROAST will be able to tell you exactly how much (or how little) it’s working, and then make it work. Try ROAST today.

7. Are you Earl Grey? Because you seem like hot tea!

8. I love my bed but would love to be in yours.

9. Are your eyes trying to strip me of my clothes?!

10. You seem like an elevator! Because I can not stop myself from going up and down on you.

11. You look perfect. And when paired with me, you will look immaculate!

12. Can you lend me a kiss? I vow to return it back to you tomorrow.

13. Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot, and I want s’more.

1. Is soda your favorite beverage? Because you look so-da-licious.

2. What was that you called yourself? Tonight, I'd like to be sure I'm shouting the correct name..

You’ll be setting up a ton of expectation with a message like this, and the look and feel of your profile will contribute to that expectation. Want to make sure you know exactly how you’re coming off? ROAST has a team to judge your profile and make it express what you want it to. It even uses AI learning to rate your profile picture against thousands of others. Try ROAST today.

3. I like the shirt you are wearing. Can you lend it to me after we have s*x?

4. I can sense your mood and lift it up if it's low.

5. We have a common ancestry: being born naked.

6. I have lost all sensation in my body. Let me feel you instead.

7. What winks like a tiger and screws like a ninja? (Wink)

8. Are you assigned to me? Simply put, I should be doing you, but I'm not

9.. Serve me like a pirate and hand me that booty.

10. If you were a flower, you’d be a damn-delion.

11. Should we start with dinner or jump directly to the sweet part?

12. If your name begins with a "C," then I "C" us getting down.

13. This sounds cheesy, but you're stimulating my arousal.

1. Ready to make half an infant?

2. Can you fit another tongue in your mouth?

3. Are you Dracula? You looked a little thirsty when you were looking at me.

4. The extent of your selfishness is astounding. Your body is yours forever, but I just need it for tonight.

5. If your upper lip is Christmas and your lower lip is Thanksgiving, can I come to visit sometime in between?

6. In my adventurous nature, I find you intriguing.

7. I recently received an invitation to a huge party between your legs.

8.As a judge, I will announce you a sentence to my bed.

9. Your candy cane clearly shows your happiness after seeing me.

10. You are the yogurt I would live to spoon tonight..

Make sure they’ll want to tickle you by setting up a profile that makes you look smokin’. You won’t find any better advice than the kind given by ROAST — a service that’ll let you know, straight up, how your profile is coming off. They’ve got years of research and experience looking into the most successful dating profiles, and they’ll help you fix yours up in no time. Take their quiz to start getting more matches.

12.  I might not be Elmo but you can tickle me nonetheless.  

13. You are the trampoline I'm going to bounce on hard.  

14. I'm making bacon for dinner. Would you like striping?  

15. Don't you ever get tired of running in my mind 24/7. 

16. Your dress is really pretty. Do you need help getting out of it without ruining it? 

1. Hey, do you have an inhaler? ‘Cause I heard you got that *ss, ma!

2. You know, if I were you, I’d have s*x with me.

3. Do you want to know how I got these muscles? Picking up beautiful women like yourself.

4. I don’t like children until they are OUR children. What do you think about that?

5. I’ve entered every country, but you are one place I’ve yet to explore.

6. It’s almost Thanksgiving. Do you want to be the turkey, and I can be the stuffing?

7. You don’t have to do the walk of shame tomorrow; I drive!

8. You must be a bowl of cornflakes because I want to spoon you.

9. I lost my condom, do you have one we could use?

10. Did you bring your umbrella? You can expect a snowstorm tonight with me.

11. Is there a mirror in your crotch because I can see myself there.

12. If you look this good with clothes on, you must be insanely hot without them.

13. Your attire looks uncomfortable; how about I help make you more comfortable?

14. Seems like you sat on a big bag of sugar since you have such a sweet *ss.

15. Kiss me on the cheek if I am wrong, but fish can fly, right?

1. If looking hot was an unlawful act, you'd be found guilty without a doubt.

2. I can see your pants swelling. We need to check immediately what is cooking in them. 

3. Looking at you turns me on all the time.  

4. The shirt you are wearing looks terrific on you. But I can bet I would look better than it.  

5. I am a gymnastics expert and I would love to help you out tonight. 

There’s one major factor that determines whether this will work or not, and it’s how you look in your profile. Get someone to judge that — not someone who knows you, but someone who knows dating apps. ROAST is run by people just like that. They’ll tell you how your profile is coming off to a person who doesn’t know you, and then show you how to fix it up. ROAST will help you get more matches and dates in no time.

6. Let's play a game where you stop, drop, and then roll to make the fire ablaze.  

7. Darling your sweetness is going to make Hershey's Kisses feel like a loser.  

8. The mirror in your picture shows me in your pants. That is some great future telling.  

9. The game for today is conductor. You will choo-choo and I will be it's engineer. 

10. You look gorgeous in clothes but I can only imagine goddesses even without them.  

11. Hey babe, your hot body can make the temperature in the north pole go down.  

12. I'm going to call the police for stealing my heart in the daylight.  

13. Oh what a loss! The same pants are available at 100% off at my place.

14. The lack of your nudity in my mind is just exceptional.  

15. Eyes never lie. And yours just told me we are going to have a great time tonight. 

1. I can bet your face will look much better with my legs around them.  

2. Tonight I'm not only going to be the devil on your sweet shoulder rather I'm going to be the devil on your lips as well.  

3. I want you to finish the following: Me + You = _____

4. I hope you don't mind dragons because tonight I am going to dragon my balls all over your face.  

5. The DNA test I took earlier shows that I am 101 percent your base.  

6. Would you like to rotate my dreidels?

7. I got Hanukkah gelt in my pockets. Do you want to go get them?

8. You’re like my menorah’s candles… getting hotter daily.

9. Ready to light my menorah?

10. Much like Santa, I also have a gift for you in my sleigh.

11. Is your name Clause, cause you got Mrs. written all over you.

12. I am no dentist but I would gladly give you the best filling of your lifetime.  

13. I am the beaver dying to get your wood.  

14. If only I could be the DNA helicase I would be able to unzip your genes easily. 

15. 206 bones make up my body. Care to hand me another?

1. Do you want to commit a sin for your next confessional?

2. Can you do telekinesis? Because you’ve made a part of me move without even touching it.

3. Is your name winter? Because you'll be coming soon.

4. I’m a mind reader, and yes, I will sleep with you.

5. Sit on my face, and I’ll eat my way to your heart.

6. I like my coffee how I like my woman… creamed.

7. I’m not into watching sunsets, but I’d love to see you go down.

8. Are you a raisin? Because you’re raisin my dick.

9. Did you grow up on a chicken farm? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.

10. I can see into the future, and yeah, we’re gonna fuck at least once.

11. Remember my name because you’ll be screaming it later.

12. You’re just like a wine tasting. They say to spit, but I always prefer swallowing.

13. I was feeling off today, but you definitely turned me on.

14. Want a job? It blows.

15. The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?

16. Tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes.

17. I lost my keys. Can I check your pants?

18. You know what I like in a girl? My dick.

19. Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.

20. When I saw you, I lost my tongue. Can I put yours in my mouth?

1. The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor.

2. Do you know sleeping alone is a waste of my sexual talent?

3. Do you work at Build-a-Bear? Because I’d Stuff you.

4. Are you butt-dialing? Because I swear that a** is calling me.

5. Do you want to go half-sies on a baby?

6. You with all those curves, and I’m the car with no breaks… ooohhh -Drake

7. You’re the first thing I’m going to do after this lockdown.

8. If I were a balloon, would you blow me?

9. Hey, may I use your thighs as earmuffs?

10. I know three ways to make six inches disappear.

11. You’re my sunshine and my rain. You make me hot and wet.

12. What are you doing tonight? I mean, besides me?

13. I ain’t a singing teacher, but I bet I could make you scream your highest note.

14. I’m lost, can I get directions to you bedroom?

15. You want to know why menu is my favorite word? ‘Cause it involves me n u.

16. Want to see a movie or do you want to make one?

17. I know you’re busy, but could you add me to your to do list.

18. I’m like a firefighter. I find them hot and leave them wet.

19. That dress looks great on you… as a matter of fact, so would I.

20. With school, I want an A. With you, I want to F.

1. Lie down on that couch and pretend your legs hate each other.

2. How do you want your eggs? Poached, scrambled, or fertilized?

3. I’m afraid of the dark. Could you sleep with me tonight?

4. That’s a nice smile. It’d look better if it were all you were wearing!

5. Kissing burns two calories per minute. We could work out sometime.

6. Do you have a switch? ‘Cause Baby, I wanna turn you on.

7. Girl, you make me want to dive into that sea… that pus-sea.

8. Do you like Disney + ? Good because we could Disney + and bust.

9. Are you a book because I’d split you open and explore your insides.

10. So what are the chances of my balls slappin’ your a** tonight?

11. Remember my name, you’ll be screaming it later.

12. Yo girl, you into fitness? Well how ’bout fitness d____ in yo mouth?

13. Roses are red, violets are fine. You be the 6, and I’ll be the 9.

14. Hey, I have a kitten. You could pet mine if I could pet yours.

15. I don’t want to initiate this conversation by saying you’re beautiful, because beauty is on the inside and i haven’t

been inside you yet.

16. I’m jealous of your heart because it’s pumping inside you and I’m not.

17. I want to kiss you passionately on the lips, and then move up to your belly-button.

18. Do you like trampolines? ‘Cause I got something for your to bounce up and downs on.

19. Are you Autumn? Because you’ll be coming soon.

20. There's a chill in the air, and I forgot my scarf. Want to wrap your legs around my neck instead?

1. Can I read your T-shirt in Braille?

2. Let’s both be naughty together and save Santa a trip.

3. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

4. Your body is a wonderland; I just want to be Alice.

5. Don’t tell me what to do unless you are naked.

6. I will kiss you. If you don’t like it, you could return it.

7. Do you have a nickname? If not, can I call you later?

8. Is your period disturbing you? If so, allow me to halt them for nine months.

9. Hey, I got your vitamin D for today.

10. Do you like Krispy Kreme? ‘Cause I’m gonna glaze your donut.

11. There will be only seven planets left after I destroy Uranus.

12. There are no chairs left. Can I sit on your face?

13. I put the STD in stud; all I need is U.

14. Hey, do you wanna be my hope? The “p” is silent though.

15. Do you work at a tech store because you turned my software into hardware.

16. If you were a part of my house, you’d be in the basement. So I could put kids inside you.

17. I heard your grades are bad. I’m sure this D won’t hurt.

18. If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?

19. Can I take you on a ate? Oh sorry, I forgot the D. I’ll give you that later.

20. I don’t think I want your babies, but I wouldn’t mind refining my baby making technique with you.

1. You are just like a snowflake: beautiful, unique, and with one touch, you’ll be wet.

2. Is your last name s*icide? Because I want to commit to you.

3. You are worth every sin.

4. I wish I were your phone so you’d be on me all day.

5. Twinkle twinkle, little star, let’s make love in my car.

6. You wanna know which hug is the best hug? One that comes with a solid a___ grab.

7. I may not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you.

8. You’re so sizzling! Can I let my volcano erupt inside you?

9. Should I make love with you like a nerdy girl or a sluty one?

10. You complete my week! Can I make your hole weak?

11. Want to go back to my place and watch porn on my flat screen mirror?

12. Are you a blanket? ‘Cause I love when you’re on top of me.

13. I’m wasted, but this condom in my pocket doesn’t have to be.

14. Are you a garden? ’cause you are turning all these hoes on.

15. I’m feeling a little off today. Could you turn me on?

16. Do you like discounts? Because clothes are 100% off in my room.

17. Pizza is my second favorite thing to eat in bed.

``18. I’m not a waitress, but I’ll take your tip.

1. Are you a mask? Because I want you on my face.

2. I promise I’m not like what you’re used to.

3. Are you the last air bender? ’cause I’d definitely like you bending for me.

4. I licked it. So It’s mine.

5. Are you from China? Cause I’m China get into those pants.

6. They call me coffee because I grind so fine.

7. I got banned from all nude beaches. They said pythons weren’t allowed.

8. I’ll kiss you in the rain so you can get twice as wet.

9. Do you like pies? I make very good cream pies.

10. Would you like some alphabet soup? because you’ll be choking on the D.

11. I’m blind, may I hold your stick?

12. I wanna do you after school like some homework.

13. Are you a doctor? Because I’ve got a bone for you to examine.

14. Has anyone ever touched your belly button from the inside?

15. Are you a rare steak? ‘Cause if you were bleeding, I’d still eat you.

16. I’m lactose intolerant but I’ll try your cream.

17. What’s a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?

18. You should sell hotdogs because you already know how to make a weiner stand.

19. We may not know each other yet, but I want them jaws and walls to know my balls.

20. I ain’t the Hulk, but I’m still trying to SMASH.

1. Feel my shirt. See, it’s made of Boyfriend Material.

2. Your a** seems like a library book? Because I can not stop myself from checking you out.

3. Is your body a map? Because I love to travel.

4. Baby, you gotta body like a Benze. I just wanna drive it once again. -Jeremih

5. Such gorgeous legs should be encircling my neck.

6. I'm curious, did your father work in the baking industry? Cause your buns are perfect!

7. I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?

8. You know, I would die happy if I saw you naked just once!

9. My tongue could do a better job of teasing you than my words can.

10. I heard you like basketball. I got two balls your chin could dribble.

11. You remind me of my big toe because I’m going to bang you on every piece of furniture I own

12. Goodnight. And if you dream of me, remember I like it rough.

13. Are you a rubix cube? Because the more I play with you the harder you get.

14. You look like a hard worker. I have an opening you can fill.

15. My voice ain’t deep, but my throat is.

16. You caused me to scream without the s.

17. Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Because you have a pretty sweet a**

18. Beauty is only skin deep, but my d___ goes in deeper.